Do You “Need” To Be Liked By Everyone?

womanNo one likes to hear the words, “I don’t like you.” Some people will do almost anything to be liked, even at the expense of their own happiness, values, beliefs and standards.

Some people’s overwhelming need to be liked is the very thing that makes them hard to like. In fact, for many people, the need to be liked is actually a significant barrier to personal and professional growth.

Not everyone is going to like you, and that’s OK. While it’s normal to want to be needed, liked, loved and important to others, it’s also crucial to GET CLEAR about WHO YOU ARE and what you stand for, and to live a life CONSISTENT with those VALUES.

When it comes to this issue, you might want to ask yourself these questions:

  • Do I speak the truth (while exercising care, wisdom and understanding even if it’s not popular to do so?)
  • Do I live a life which is consistent with my core values?
  • Do I operate with integrity?
  • Do I believe that my motives are good?
  • Is it my goal to be a positive influence in the lives of others?
  • Am I happy to disagree with people I like?
  • Do I like me?

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Inspired Wellness

Healthy Blessings,

 Gena Livings




  1. Thank you for this post, Gena. I really loved the questions; quite thought provoking. I’d like to think I can answer YES to all of them, but I don’t know if that answer will be consistent each time. Lots of stuff to think about. Thanks.

  2. Yes, so very true. To many folks water down their message to the point of mediocrity because they don’t want to offend other people. And yet as messengers we know that we cannot possibly talk to everyone. It’s pointless to try… and it’s exhausting and ineffective too. I’m just composing a blog on this very same topic. Very timely. Thank you!!!

    • Thanks for commenting Rachel. I’ll look forward to reading your post on this same topic!! This is such an important subject matter
      because when we place too much emphasis on what others think about us, we end up giving our power away. A lot of the things that people believe what others are thinking of them is self created and/or imagined. No matter what others tell you about yourself, it doesn’t really matter because what you believe yourself to be is what you really are!
      Thanks Rachel!
      Healthy blessings,
      Gena 🙂

  3. Great post! Many very good points. I’ve never really tried to be liked, I don’t know why but I’ve mostly been very well liked.

    I have always just strived to be fully me.

    I think some of the best advice I ever got was from my Grandma, she said “If you want good neighbors, be a good neighbor. If you want good friends, be a good friend.”

    So, I’ve always just been to others what I’d want them to be to me and then allowed them to like or not like me as their own decision knowing I did my part. 🙂



    • That is really good advice from your Grandma Kathy. Makes sense to me and that is why you are naturally liked today! Always treat others in the same way that you want to be treated and you are going to get positive results and a lifetime of solid friendships!!
      Thanks for responding and sorry for the delay,
      Healthy Blessings,
      Gena 🙂 🙂

  4. We can’t please everybody 100% of the time and in the same token, we can’t get along with everyone, nor can we expect everyone to like us.

    I am happy being me and just as happy being this way with the people I resonate with. Those who don’t care for how I act, talk, look, etc… don’t matter.

    • Bonnie Gean,
      I really like your Spirit!!!! You have the right idea!
      Healthy Blessings,
      Gena 🙂 🙂

  5. Excellent article, Gena! It’s so easy to become wishy washy keeping the masses happy, and most times others are only too happy to have someone else say that they disagree or give another point of view. This can all be done in a positive way and does not have to be in a hurtful manner. We need to learn more about this to help us cope as we get older – so much more useful! Communication is vital to understanding and acceptance, even if not “being liked”

    • Great point Tami!
      I think it’s all about speaking our truth even if it means not being liked. It may not be comfortable, but the truth will ultimately set us free. Being authentic with ourselves and with others is the key to self empowerment. I always say; Be who you are, take what you get and love yourself so much that whether or not you are liked by others, you can at least respect yourself. And like you said, “this can all be don in a positive way and does not have to be in a hurtful manner.” Amen to that! 😀
      Healthy blessings,
      Gena Livings

  6. I remind my kiddos of this all the time. Some of them don’t care, but I have a couple who try to please everybody. I have to remind them that it’s absolutely impossible to please EVERYBODY, and that they just need to do what’s right and not worry about what others think. It’s a lesson I constantly have to remind myself of, too.

    • Amy, that sounds like sound advice because it’s true that you just cant please everybody. Trying to please everyone is a mission doomed for failure (truth: it will only drive you crazy), and as the saying goes, “those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” For your own happiness and sanity, learn to feel good about what makes you different — regardless of what anyone else has to say on the matter.
      Healthy blessings,
      Gena Livings 🙂

  7. Lovely post, Gena. Sometimes we are chasing other’s approval when the very thing is us needing our own : )

    • Well said Hemal. It’s important to first cultivate love and approval for yourself. That way, this gift can be given and received abundantly.
      Healthy Blessings,
      Gena 🙂

  8. Great post! Another great reminder that we need to make sure we love ourselves first and let the chips fall where they may.Being authentic is a true journey. Living without fear of not being liked is something many of us courageously endeavor to do daily. Thanks so much for posting! God bless you and all that you do!
    Toy recently posted…True Love Will Wait and True Love Will Find YouMy Profile

    • Thank you Toy, I always appreciate you.
      I so agree with you that being authentic is definitely challenging for most everyone I know, talk to, and work with. The fear of not being liked is so very real for so many of us. The more we can get in touch with our own personal difficulty with being authentic, the more able and willing we’ll be to move past whatever stops us from being real. But first, we have to notice our own resistance to authenticity, with compassion, and then tell the truth about it so we can move forward in strength.
      Love and gratitude for your comment.
      Healthy Blessings,

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